Don't touch my things! #OctPoWriMo 2013 day 12

So it was quite some while back

pretty things which I cant share. 

"No one dare touch my things"

Thats all I said

Stay away from the bags & shoes

of my barbie dolls

I love it so much 

If you will play with it

Ouch! it will hurt

Going forth on timeline

Little kids who visit our home

always want a toy of two

the stuff dolls

or Doreamon

My mother sees the look on my face

Sigh! Its so hard to give them away

Loving them with all my heart

and now seeing them in their hands

"Dont touch my things" 

Deep down inside, I say

Now that I have grown age-vise

the mind still remains in that time

the toys sit still on my table

the barbie dolls have been

sleeping inside the wardrobe

Still, sharing things which I love

have been, oh! so difficult

For I get attached to things so much

they have been with me all the way

the first friendship band from second standard

fallen beads of broken necklace

earrings that someone gifted

or just the chocolate wrappers

They are all on the form of some memoirs

The shadows dont leave me

Not of mine, but of things I love

But I want them to stay

Stay for the sake of happy times

or sad ones instead

Picture Courtesy- Hardik Photography

कुछ समान

कल तुमने कुछ समान माँगा था अपना
आज मैं माँग रही हू
इतना हक़ तो है ना?
हो सके तो लौटा देना


उस रत बिखरा हुआ काजल
तुम्हारे कमीज़ से मला था

वो कमीज़ रख लो
हो सके
तो वो काजल के धब्बे लौटा देना


एक हरा कुर्ता बड़े प्यार से दिया था तुम्हे
जो दरवाज़े की कुण्डी में आकर
फट गया था कौने से
याद है, सीला था मैने उसे
उसी से मिलते झुलते हरे रंग के धागे से
वो कुर्ता रख लो
हो सके
तो वो हरा धागा लौटा देना


पिछली बरसातो में
तुम्हारे ही तौलिए से
सिर सुखाया था मैने अपना
कुछ बाल टूटकर ज़मीन पर गिरे थे
वो तौलिया रख लो
हो सके
तो वो टूटे बाल लौटा देना


कल तुमने कुछ समान माँगा था अपने
आज मैं माँग रही हू
इतना हक़ तो है ना
हो सकते तो लौटा देना

If it makes you happy, it can't be that bad

Its been a long time since I've written something here and even longer since I've written about 'someone' straight from heart. Yet, this post goes out happily to a girl I've met by fluke. Only two things gives me irks at the bottom of my heart: one, seeings plastic bags at my home and two, setting adieu to someone dear. Letting go is surely the hardest moment of all. So, this post clearly goes off at bidding goodbye to a girl we all know, all because am better at writing than saying.

Meeting someone gives you a smile
Knowing that someone makes you feel content
Acknowledging lows & highs brings a strange feeling of togetherness
Goodbyes sets you even closer

Like a winterland princess, living in her own forms, surviving against all odds, somehow managing to set sails in high tides, filled with elation- this is remarkably known Jagriti. With her roll number prior to mine, I've grown fonder of her, slowly yet definitely. With each summer shining bright, each rain getting stronger, each autumn making us move on and each winter getting colder, she's risen above all.

You know when you meet someone
There's a flicker in eyes, a charm in words
Another attitude flowing in awes and oos
Its another friend you've met.

There's something about her, I thought clicking pen on my bench when she walked in the classroom; a rare sight, seriously. Which is beyond we can see, imagine or understand. She has a gift by Him. A gift which she knows she possess and respects it. Its not just a gift of being beautiful outside, its something deep inside. There's some charade about her, which makes us go even crazier for her.

Its been a long time, yes
Some enigma in her soul
I frequently ask this question
How can someone remain so blithe?

I knew this quote was right: "the girl who laughs the most is the one who cries at night", used a lot in movies and often deduced out of a happy girl by all. Bogus! Delusive! Made up!
Jagriti has changed my definition of being 'happy'. The supernatural being who's made everyone her's, seeing through the transparent mind and soul of all. Flowing in with all's sorrows and smiles. I've seen her grow even better than us.

The break-ups leave us crippled
More parched for true love
She has however gone a different way
Break up brings you closer to the real 'you'.

The girl who has emerged in a better way after break up. Never looked back and sailed with good winds leaving the world watch her with every step she takes towards mending herself all throughout. Personally, its because of her I started taking my break-ups in an affirmative manner. Will I ever see her again? This is a question I've stopped asking, for we set our own trends & ways. Sooner or later, meeting is marked.


I see you flying a midst the storm
Is this delusion that I see your wings?
Or is it as they say;
you are truly a blessed one

The sun is setting we say
You'd rather wait for new days
Filling wounds with happiness
Would you teach us how?

Blitheness, cheerfulness, delight
You've made it yours- the dark night
We see you fly
"There she goes, when we might see her again?"

The numb words have preoccupied us
Here are the only ones that I have:
May you glow higher than moonlight
The world shall never set you apart
Glee be your mate forever
Happiness stay with you thereafter

-Much Love
Aavika

Well, the post doesn't end here, a few words by your algorithms are:

Anjali 
With you, I need no long essays to express my love
I'll miss your routine calls
I'll miss your tragic stories
The fun we had that night
The chats we used to have during labs

The way you used to irritate me by your silly questions
Trust me, no one can do that, that cutely
No matter where we all end up Jagriti,
You will be missed
Love

Anu
Jagriti, you are the most jaunty and lively person I have ever met. Your mere presence brings a msile to everyone's face... you are the girl with purest soul.. I will miss your stupid long long stories and the way you said "anjali, anu kuch samajh nahi aa raha kya karu". when you are totally blank during exam times (actually most of the time). Just want to say all the best for your future, may you get through the best college and succeed in your life ahead. Keep laughing an take care, will miss you a lot and I know you will miss me too.
P.S- Benzene hamari presence feel karta rahega tumhe!

Shivangi
I would remember you as a girl who hardly attended college. Every other day you had something or other to share with all those twists and turns in your crazy life. A girl running for assignments, attendance or some advice, with no relatives in Delhi but so many friends. Hope to see you a little less confused in future and continue being smart, sweet, hot, fun, lively, bubbly person that you are. And all these years spent in chem hons venky, we have a strong bonding with "Benzene".

Vartika
Adieu!
Miss horny! I know I realized it later but its a toast to be your friend in every way. You are the inspiration for all of us to live your life so lively. I treasure every moment spent with your especially the naval thing (our new invention together). It wont be the same without you girl. Wish you a best "kanpuria" life ahead!

Happy times! 

Just we all look so grown up here! :O

Fly high Jagriti!

Empty Lockers

Once a venkyite, always a venkyite

"Finally the day has come when we empty our lockers", I said looking in her eyes and she broke down in tears instantly.
Chemistry Hons is mostly about labs, I say to people. You spend four hours daily in labs, testing, detecting, creating, destroying, burning, breaking, charring, sweating, finding, washing, heating, drying, rushing and what not, obviously wearing a lab coat. In a trice after the final practical, it felt like its time has come to return the apparatuses, empty our very own lockers and go forever out of the place which always felt like ours. No more acid marks on our clothes, shoes or burns on our skins, annoying teachers screaming on head, stinky smell from lab coats which became un-washable for all mothers, all has passed us by. Thats the point when you know; its time to go.
The foyer where we made our plans, files, assignments, the back lawn where we ate and hang out, the front lawn where we prepared for exams, the dark science block, will keep lingering in my thoughts forever; maybe in black & white.
Another great phase has ended.
This too, has passed.
These are a few photos which will remind us of labs for a long time.

The botany lab

Physics ka dark room!

the memories of fuming H2SO4 which aastha is taking with her

monika during physical practical

when we were freshers

inorganic labs

You Form An Inseparable Part Of My Life

                                                       -An Irreplaceable Love of Father & his daughter

I see his wrinkles appearing as my cheek bones do
I see his skin getting dull as mine starts getting new
His shoulder gets weak as he carries his bag to work
His feet gets swollen sometimes red
His eyesight is diminishing with every passing seasons of nature
He is my father & I am his daughter


I remember the days he carried me on his shoulder
The long walks in middle of huge forests
Him running besides my bicycle rides
When I look back, I see his face admiring mine
What fury of nature is this
Which I fail to understand?


We see the seasons transiting over time
Old leaves fall and new arrive
The nature but; fails to destroy our bonds
Love; astounding love that exists in our souls
One day will arrive
When he may not be around
When he might be a part of nature only
But sadly, not of me
What will I do then; I ask myself
For I keep shut for a while
And put the thoughts aside


His wrinkled hands may not be on my head
His awaited morning hugs may not be any more cherished
Indeed, life will go on forever
With his teaching that I will always remember
"Believe in yourself", as he'd always say
"Don't look back and to yourself; never betray"


He holds my hand through time of worry
I behold my head up high and fly
The black sky turns beautiful blue at once
As I keep my head on his shoulders
For time may come and time may go
He is my father & I am proudly his daughter

Oh! The little things

The exams are over now. Relieved all are. Happy all are. Rejoiced all are. Cheerful all are. Off to playground. The swing just keeps calling. The voices of friends keep echoing in the head. The cricket bat and ball keep re-appearing at the back of mind. The bell of cycle just keeps forcing to get down the stairs as soon as possible. The flapping of cycle paddles awakes the soul. The houses made of mud were all alone till yesterday. The barbie dolls haven't slept since nights, someone needs to change her clothes and comb her hair. The kitchen set haven't fed anyone for days now. The building blocks haven't built anything since days. The toy cars need to be ridden again. The buildings are left wandered without chupan chupai. The roads are empty without the pakadam pakdai. The stappo has vanished off the roads. It needs to be drawn again. So many things to be done. Its just a huge, never ending list.
But wait! There's even more. The new books have arrived in the stores. One must insist the parents to get it as early by today evening, after all, all the friends have bought them. The books beget in bundles. Two bundles, each of notebooks and books. All piled up subject-wise. Tightened with strong threads. All comes along a list. The fun finds its way, when the things listed are cross checked with what is in the bundle. The books are fresh with white soft pages. A different fragrance reaches the lungs along with deep breaths. Name stickers are pasted on the new copies and are now arranged rightly in the book shelf, replacing the old books.
Off to play we go again!
Thats a 'little' tribute to school days. :)
Thanks to a cousin who came home for a week and made us all live again.

Winter Memories

I love winters. This happens to be the best line to stat this post. The morning fog. The colored stoles. The beautiful caps. The cute gloves. The woolens. I happen to love it all. I happen to wear every color other than the usual blacks and browns in the winters.
I look a little fat in winters, that surely isnt the whole book about winters. I love them cos I get dreamy.
I write with my colorful gloves on. And I get lost. Get lost in the dreams of Life. Dreams of what my future would be. And I text him with my colorful gloves in middle of the morning 8:45 am class. I surely hate that class!
And I rest my head on the support made by elbows. The tiny gloves warm my cheeks. And I dream some more now with my face titled. And I stay like that until the bell rings.
Going back home, I saw a tiny cut sleeves jacket at Monte Carlo, a little costly it was. I remember how my mum used to make many such for me. How stupidly the factory 'things' have replaces mumma's 'Love'. I went back home and asked her to make more today itself.
"I am the designer, and you are the tailor.. oops! creator", I said to her.
She briskly refuses my proposal in a laughing tone. I tried convincing, even offered her a salary (Yeah, I haphazardly tried to bribe her) but couldn't. Even though I know the tiny flying threads gets into her mouth and the doctor asked her many years back, never to do it again.
"I'll bring you a mask, mumma", I said laughingly.
The winters were memorizing then, when she used to make tonnes of beautiful sweaters for me and my sister. The sweater with many colors used. Woven with hooks and many colorful beautiful gems looking buttons. The creative necks and collars. I remember how the aunties sitting under sun wiving for their little ones, would stop me from my plays and turn me all around and touch my sweaters and try to hack the woolen codes. They failed substantially.

L-R: Me, younger brother, elder sister, each in our woven sweaters.

The one I still carve for was a grey one, at the back of which, with yellow (my favorite) was written "AAVIKA". I loved it everyday. But, it happens that when you grow up a little, you are forced and supposed to give it to your younger ones. I loathed this ceremony. Instead, I did not get anything as good as I was giving. My heart sank. And sank with every sweater. With every pull over. And I never talk to those "stealing cousins". Today, I dont really know who would be wearing my AAVIKA sweater as my cousins have also grown up now. Hope wherever it is, its safe.
Nonetheless, I started making something, on a very little base however. I made a purple muffler for my barbie doll, which I knew I wont give it to anyone. Yes, I can make mufflers out of a woolen ball. Its not such a work! One day, I will make many for my mumma, for sure.
Happy Winters!!!

Completely Naive..:)

The whole year passes by, I, pretending always how grown up I am. Like how coolly I can just do everything: Shopping, billing, and blah blah. Just it happened on the morning of 14th Novemeber, when just as the ritual, my dad gave money to my younger brother (who is 14 going to 15) to spend on 'Children's Day'. I, envious even asked for mine. Not just the money I demanded, but 'a right to be a child again' was what I wanted. My dad gave me none. Why? Cos 4 months to go, am gonna be 19.
Depressed, I return back to looking-in-the-mirror-while-brushing. How lame! I say while I bang my brush on the basin. Off to college in the metro, I still dreamed of a few years back, when even I celebrated at school (even buying a spring roll with friends at canteen was a celebration).

The wondrous years passed by, and never had I thought they would pass too soon. Playing whole day, no one to scold. I was the winner of all the games, which comprised of Stappu, gallery, hide n seek and many more. Swinging on the swings, swinging the highest, we always tried to touch the top bar of a tree behind, tremendously while swinging. Bob cut, open, air rushing through them while swinging. How amazing those days were. And I ruled the world, the gang leader I was, in my 3-6th standard school time. Just a few days back it was when I learned to ride a bike with my oldest of oldest friend- Deeksha. Falling down at every paddle, still she pushing me to try again. No heartbreak warfares. No fights, discrimination. Asking for a glass of water after every half an hour of playing from 'Ground floor wali auntie', we used to call. The skipping rope, my record for 117 skips non-stop. Dare would anyone break it. The rolling skates. The dolls. The kitchen set. The daddy's shoulder. The parent's scolds. Going to the school with a water bottle around the neck. Singing the nursery poems with actions. No matter what, I still have maintained the favorite hobby: Fighting with my brother almost daily, pulling my dad's cheek daily and pissing off my sister, again, daily. Watching cartoons is still in my daily catalogue.

So, where did those days go? True- Day by day nothing changes, but when you look back, everything is different. 
And so, arrives Dhaula Kuan Station, I get down. A 15 minutes walk from childhood to adulthood. From school to college.
The day passes just as I superficially wished all "Happy Children's Day". Home back, the celebration starts. Shahi paneer made at home (in which the paneer slicing was done by me, proud) followed by an ice cream. And so, as rightly said by dad-"No matter how much you all grow, you will still and always remain kids for us". (I glanced if that meant for my almost 22 years sis) Relief!

"Some people do not become adult. They just remain childlike ever-green, and luckily, you are one of them", says my mum to me.

Somewhere, we have the infant in us. Let it come out, for a child cannot be caged.
Happy Children's Day to all!

So Yesterday

I remember I was in 7th standard since I loved the Disney Hit series of Lizzie McGuire. Broad casted in India in 2005-2007/8 (I roughly have a glimpse of past).  My dinner was just booked with it. Nobody would dare to touch the remote at 10pm in my hand and I would make everybody watch it too. Yes, my ignition of teenage life started with her. Learned a lot from her, the school life, and what not (even though it barely had any resemblance with Indian schooling, still close to me). Never did I know how would I survive without it. After me reaching 10th standard maybe, it ended (after repeating the full fleshed series for almost ten times). Dare would I miss any episode, no matter how many times I had witnessed it, my eyes would always glue to her, her friends, family, her notorious little brother, and her crushes. Not to forget, her cartoon protagonist which would appear in some or the other scenes. Oh! I was in touch with her even before my first crush (so, its quite an old thing). She just sembled "me".
It happened that evening, me returning from my regular tuitions, my eyes were awestruck when I saw her first ever video from her album. Yes, I had known she was a singer too, but never had I seen any videos from her. Never had I known her as something out of her daily routined Disney show. Man! I love that video as it even inspired me to use a kajal (her eyes simply beautiful to me). She was fat, at that time. Even though aware of this fact, I would still fight with my friends screaming, "she isn't fat! Don't say this ever again". She had a little pale yellow teeth and I would still scream, "Maybe she had jaundice which left her with this" or blabber anything with over the par confidence.

                                                                  ...............................

Today, me sitting at North Campus' Nirula's, saw one of her old videos (when maybe she was 16/17) on 40 inch LCD in the eatery joint. "To the beat of my heart". 
Yes, she was fat. I recognized the body again, even though now she is way thinner.
I madly saw the video without a blink. I still remember each word, I sang it moving my legs to and fro under the table, like a kid again.
Yes, I imagined myself. Even shorter than am now. Discussing the previous night's episode with school friends in two cat-like-ponies. Coming back home, I would watch her videos in my then-new pc (we bought it when I was in 8th standard), literally jump on the bed and give similar expressions as she did in her video with something that could pretend to be a mic for me.
I came back home today. Opened this youtube thing, which I barely use. With eagerness I typed, "Hilary Duff- Beat of my heart".
Saw this video first time in like 3-4 years. Happy as a bird am! I felt each pinch of those days.. again.
Followed by the first video I ever saw, "So Yesterday". 

Not to forget, I have seen her each movies like 5-10 times (at least) and each video like don't know how many times (even memorized many of her dialogues which I still speak along while watching her movies).

How weird life is sometimes. How do we even dare to forget the things we promised never to? How did I forget the one person who made my entrance into the teenage years way simpler which wouldn't have been so at her absence.

For a few people on the planet Earth who do not know about Lizzie McGuire, this is a must visit link:
http://lizzie.dan.info/
My ever favorite videos:
"Hilary Duff- So yesterday" http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lt6PVVr4B04&feature=relmfu
"Hilary Duff- Beat of my heart" http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eVExfTxg5is&feature=relmfu

Getting renewed

The mirthful day's picture is honestly abridged without a walk- I believe.
Which I can never compromise with. Listening to music is another habit I avoid. I cannot just happen to miss the pulchritude of milieu which absorb me. That's my assiduity to nature. Eerie start flowing within me when I view the occult "things" around me. Things: two children on one huge bicycle, managing not to fall; dragonflies, walking on the footpath and the cars passing by in blue streak, providing wind into the roots of my hair; background music played by the nature comprising of birds and trees with leaves dancing. A few, dance too much that they fall.
Its astonishing. I look down as I watch fallen yellow lilies all over the footpath, till the end of my sight. Where I still try to prevent stepping on them, while humming some tune of my own creation.
How in Love I have been with the nature lately. Not lately, since I got introduced to it. How magically it captivates the very souls of me. Haven't witnessed any more better thing. The clear orange cum blue sky, windy atmosphere and dew drops somewhere in the heart of the air.
I've escaped from the assiduousness of life.
For a moment I've become as light as a feather, ready to be carried away by the air. For a moment, have become as soft as a pearl, ready to be woven with flowers. For a moment, have become as swift as the leaves, ready to dance with them.
For me, walk is an important hustle of the day. How unfinished the day gets when it lacks.
A ten minutes walk from metro to college in the morning gives me the oomph which I beseech. Another ten minutes walk from metro to home in the evening give me time to introspect about the on going processes.
Never have I gotten tired of walking during these times, mentally. But that's what sets things straight for me.
One good thing, gets followed by another- One of the another things I believe.
I enter home, bowl over, I look with amazement around.
Flowers of the best kind I ever saw all over my place.

Mum got it. (for free she said while sitting and reading newspaper in the balcony).
The gift of Him which I kept praising all over way to home, is at my place. Am blessed by nature, (one more thing) I believe.
I witnessed the Love, a selfless one.

Saawan ke jhule pade... tum chale aao..

How busy as a beaver I've been this week. Not just week, the entire month. No time to breath, no time for introspection, no time to sleep properly. The assiduous days flow one after another.

Me, at friend's pg today, the park just a few meters away from my eyes at Satya Niketan. How astonishing the view is when it gets dark. Not literally dark, somewhat in between dark and evening. The bridge in between that time. Being lethargic I only gaze my eyes at the people. At the juveniles mainly. Their life, their moments, I can only live mine. The comparison just comes inside without knocking the door. How insane I've been all my life. Grown so much in past three years. Transited myself into something, that for now, I do not have a reverse gear. I just wanna get lost somewhere. Wanna escape the ongoing activities of life for sometime. On the other hand, life never greets me with breaks. Not even one. Time travelling awaits me. Seems like it was years back. How childish I had been. How insane. How funny. How precious, to me. How much I've always adored myself more than anyone. How well I used to tackle the titsy bitsy cobwebs of life. How I was always stuck into the black hole of happiness.

I laughed out as a girl pushes the another off the swing. I laughed some more when they fight, even when the another swing is empty. It makes me remember some more phases of me. 

How life has just dramatically transformed me. So, are the people around me. I think am more influenced. 

The heavier loads of problems flowing just in one after another. Some still flowing in my veins. I, being a bona fide laziest person, is too comatose to just fit back into the satchel and start fighting those things which are busting forth with me.

Tried to solve many, created many many more. Made friends globally, but left my own. Metamorphosised myself for rest. To such an extent by now, things cannot be solved. Just inhaled it all. Somewhere in the rush of city, I have lost my soul.  Somewhere long back. In oder to run from troubles, I ran away from myself. Maybe cos the storms hit when I was just in a boat, not a huge Titanic. The boat, is devastated by now. But, instead of constructing the boat, am on my way to build Titanic. To some extent, its done. Hoping it will be on its verge of end-construction before the storms would hit again. 

But, wait.. the Titanic did sink at the end.... The only hope to survive dies by now.. again. 

Not so early.. I'll construct more rescue boats. 

Just as the debate goes on in my tiny head, I start singing.. 

Saawan Ke Jhoole Pade, Tum Chale Aao

tum Chale Aao, Tum Chale Aao

aanchal Naa Chhode Meraa, Paagal Huyee Hain Pawan
ab Kyaa Karu Main Jatan Dhadake Jiyaa Jaise Panchhee Ude

dil Ne Pukaaraa Tumhe, Yaadon Ke Parades Se
aatee Hain Jo Desh Sen, Hum Us Dagar Pe Hain Kab Se Khade

jab Hum Mile The Piyaa, Tum Kitane Naadaan The
hum Kitane Anajaan The, Baalee Umareeyaan Mein Nainaa Laden

A melodious track by Lata ji. 

The song, dedicated to my early life. I miss those days. Surrounded by a few friends, few happiness moments which I have lived heavily. Hoping to get back soon! 

Here's the link to the song.. do give it an ear..

http://ishare.rediff.com/music/music/saawan-ke-jhoole-pade-tum-chale-aao-rashi/3847766

The Ting Things

It was day before yesterday, when my elder sis was planning to donate what we call waste to a shelter home called "kilkari" under the infamous ngo "Dil se". Yes, she is a regular volunteer there. It feels like a great deed to me. I, myself, have donated tonnes of clothes to many shelter homes. It feels heaven when I imagine children wearing my ex-favorite clothes. In spite of the fact that some exes can not be forgotten. Even if they are blurred from mind, they cannot be erased from memories. Something similar happened that night.
As soon as she collected the stuff and made, like four bags out of it, I was called upon, to lessen the burden. "You should be in packers and movers", she says. Yes, I can squeeze bags into bag & things into thing.
"I cannot give this, sorry. Am taking it back", I said to her.
"You dammit, you do not even remember when you touched it or even glared or gazed at it last time", she said.
"Chuck it, its mine, I cant give it away", I said.
"What the hell yaar? This can be useful to someone", she said.
"It is useful to me", I said.
She was quite.
"Atleast, pack the rest", she said. For she cannot do this without me.
Feeling like winning a battle, I glared at it.
Rotated it top to bottom. Left to right. Gazed at it, and quietly kept it back in the upper shelf of the almirah (where it has been kept like this since years and decades maybe).
It was my first teddy bear. Not like rest what are usually kept at archies. No, not at all.
It is very bright. Fore-casted in yellow & blue colors. With a cap almost equalizing its own size. Tiny little ears and hands ready to hug. Small.
It took me back to when I was six or seven years old.
(I do time travelling a lot, trust me)
I remember how I used to make id cards for them. Pin them up on their chest. Prepare tiny notebooks for all my toys and teach them. And even make tiny homes for them. I can only laugh at my silly games now. Seems like yesterday only. Wish those days had never passed.

A happy go luck child, as I have always been :)

All I know about me is, I cannot get rid of things. I just cannot. More of I do not "wish to" rather than "cannot". Be it my kitchen set, be it my all the then-latest barbies which made all my mates jealous (and I teased them more), be it my toys (even all I got from happy meals), be it my friendship bands (yes, I possess even my first ever one), be it anything and everything. Its all in the lower berth of my almirah. Even though it takes dot fifty percent of my almirah's space which leaves my mum always shouting at me to throw them away, but that's one of the things I just won't do. I am fond of keeping memories, in the form of photos, videos, gifts, anything. Cos, I just get connected to them. Parallel to it, I am very much connected to my childhood. Maybe because its very special to me or maybe because am still living in it.
The time travelling gets over.
"Do it fast now will you?", screamed my sis.
"Packers & movers on their duty", I said.
Withing two minutes, I made two bags out of four. Satisfaction with relief follows from her side.

A toast to the wondrous year::2010

31st December 2009: "At the stroke of midnight hour, when the world parties hard, I , Aavika Dhanda, shall be studying for the second pre-board examinations", I said this when an acquaintance asked me my new year plans.

Never so ever, had my imagination went to the point, where am standing now. Watching the most successful, magnificent, flamboyant year of my life pass by. Aghast! this year has come to an end, my mind recapitulates everything. Here's my agglomeration of remembrances.

chaman aka senapati

Remembering the end of schooling times still kills my heart. The unexpected farewell, which we all had expectedly struggled for, was highly touching. Right from shedding the pearls of tears on my bestie Chaman urf senapati's shoulder at the end of the school to the canteen times, fighting over stupid issues, cheering each other at times of frequent failures, the metro talkies, was all painful yet so full of happinesses. I thank him for everything.

End of the school life was like crossing a bridge of my life. The bridge that will never be crossed again. Left me with lacerate, lachrymals. But, that was just the beginning. For I realized, I hadn't lost anything, rather gained everything. Keeping the love, compassion, experiences of all kinds in my sack, I carried on my journey.

The real success stories began later.

Notes I made for future:-

Interest- unknown

Choice- unknown

Institute- unknown

Ambition- known

And this known quantity made me have a face-off with the unknown ones.

lifelong friendship

Making a tough decision for future, not keeping even any other alternate option alive, had my hopes almost murdered. When nobody had been there for me. My bestest best friend (infamous Samvita) stood by me. ... she kept me alive.. my spirits and my soul alive. The times when I cannot breathe, due to sorrow or due to overwhelmingly in happiness, she, I know is here. I need not ask. She seamstresses my life and is my opium. I salute our six long years of friendship, the world knows, its the strongest. (And, i love your new boots)

Finally, all my friends had left the city for higher studies. Having only a few left here.. I defined life in three simple words "Life goes on..."

Getting into the College of dreams: 

Meenakshi: first college friend

Gelling with the people here, wasn't a piece of cake though. New people, new area, new friends, new choices, new similarities, new dissimilarities which kept me at shake. Not until I met Meenakshi, turning out to be my first college friend. A girl very simple and elegant yet complex, thunderous anger and calm heart. Until I could have known her better, we were parted in different sections. Things started becoming unsaturated.

            

vartika and me. similar shades

I kept myself at bay, noticing people, who should be relevant to be my friend
Finally, His Grace provided me with Vartika, the Lucknow Girl. Persona so powerful that I had known am in love again. As ambitious person, a freelancer of life, a careless bird like me. Straight forward, intelligent, intellectual, trustworthy, what more could I have imagined? I started liking college now. Had fun, did notorious and embarrassing stuffs (for instance :the field one, I shall never forget and neither will let you).

Geeta Di- will miss you! 

Going to their Paying Guests House, still makes me remember someone special. A very belle person inside out, her presence I'll embrace forever. A women who touched my heart deeply leaving with a deep scar in our memories. In such a lesser time, she made me feel like she's my soul sister. The way we laughed, talked, draped was so similar.
We love you Geeta Di!

Saumya: my mentor

With a clinch, I still have another lady to be credited. Whom I'll never let go. The women who inspires me, helps me, stands for me, protects me from troubles incoming every possible angles of life. Her voice spreads magic in my land with love and comfort. What more a startled bird, ready to take off, could have asked for? Saumya Di! Personality just as her name means. Met her by fluke. Seems more like my mentor. The one with power and audacious nature. Love you so much, even the words can't define.

I remember very clearly how in yesteryears I had a will to do something for the world. Unfortunately, with the lack of sources and confidence, the world pushed me back. Now, here, in my new world, have finally done something fruitful this year.

3rd December :World Disability Day

Working with disabled at Karampura was like a dream come true for me.

Sign Language is for all

Celebrating the World Disability Day at India Gate on 3rd December 2010 was something out of this world.
Met many influencing people. I realized that they are none different than us, rather they think ten times better than us.

Doing some worth work

Teaching the labour children of the college was yet another jollification.
pheww!! have finally done something. I am something. My full gratitude to the Social Service Society "PARIVARTAN" of my college.

Experience unforgettable 

Watching Common Wealth Games for first time at a stadium rather than at idiot boxes was a feeling renowned. Hearing the screams of all, the roar of audiences which integrated up as "one". The nationalism during the national anthem being sung was truly amazing.






One more was visiting one of the most beautiful islands of the planet!

the experience undefined

Have only imagined infinite ocean with the cool breeze at dreams. Only until the dream went true! The ocean wind passing through my hair, refreshing my veins, my clothes which daily get swayed away the wind, but then it was different: It was the breeze.
I thank my parents for completing the dream!



At times, I feel , there is a long list of people I am indispensable of.

Sanchi (met her somewhere in bus, when she was lost and confused. Now she is my good friend)
Varuna, Priyam, Deeksha, Drish.
One of such is Aastha, of my batch. A super intelligent girl who unlike other geeks. I thank her for helping me always, not for being selfish and not to forget, being pure at heart. My life's burden is halved cos of her. Plus, thanks for keeping my secrets under your kitty (sshhhh).. She is the one I can never remunerate.

At the end, filled with more positive aura, vibes, alacrity around me, I realized some credence. I have actually spent an entire year with "one love". The year with no harsh breaks ups, cut offs, world wars....just selfless love. The 2011 resolution list won't be having "meet love of life" now, neither will any year's.
I am filled over the brim with gratitude for year 2010 which has brought a new term "us" fulminating "me" and "you". Feels like "we" are in some renege. As if, every step I took since the moment I could walk was a step toward finding you.

You complete me

Amor

The dignity and respect we have for each other, without any formalities is now sealed with a guarantee that we are the "ones" for each other. How does it feels to have met a perfect person, not to die for, but to live for?

"Epitomizing Pure Love", is what strikes my mind. Reached a stage where those three magic words which everyone longs to hear, seems less for us to reflect what we feel.
"Cos its you and me and all other people who've nothing to do, nothing to lose".

My new year resolutions would be just two:

• gain weight
• spread happiness

Taking a huge sigh of relief, I amidst the endless rain outside, set a farewell to this colourful year of my life, filled with sunshine all across me and trust me, no remorses. I hope all gems of my life are always studded in my life's jewelery set.
May God kiss us all, the upcoming year and all the years to pass by.

31st December 2010: "At the stroke of midnight hour, when the world parties hard, I , Aavika Dhanda, shall be studying for the first semester examinations", I said this when the same acquaintance asked me my new year plans.

We laughed.