Deep Thought

"A man would do nothing, if he waited until he could do it so well that no one would find fault with what he has done"
- Cardinal Newman

Wednesday, April 25, 2012

Part-III Bring Me to LIFE

Its been two days since I'd touch that window. That sinful window. That angelic window. That painful window. That soothing window. My friends often talk about it, some have gained a lot, some have lost their souls. I wonder what would the window bring to me.

"Man cannot discover new oceans,, if he does not leave sight  of the shore", - Andre Gide.

Should I try? Should I walk on the path nobody has walked on? Or should I follow the footprints of the ancients? Should I discover my own destiny? What if I fail?
I went to the room. It was daytime. The window was throwing in the sunlight. No one was around. It felt warmer as I walked towards it. It is calling me. My new destiny screams my name.
I know what so ever lies behind these frames will alter my destiny. Be in a good sense, be it in bad. But, I'll be satisfied. Lest am trying. The recklessness is already stabbing my soul each second.
Finally, I collected some grit and reached the window. Even if someone was there to haul me from behind, I would still push it open. The pane was too tight, maybe no one has ever opened it before. The pane moved, a bit, sunshine entered the room from the corner. The pane slowly opened more, and enlightened my soul with freshness and sunlight. Yes, I opened it!
The pane led me into a new world. A world where newness brewed me up, sunshine hit my tiniest bits of mind. This is even more beautiful than I'd desired.
The world outside is green. The yellow flowers bloomed wherever I see. The scent of happiness traveled through my veins. White doves are flying. There's a pond which has tiny fishes clearly visible cos of crystal clear water. And in the center of this par- imaginative place, there is a tree. A not-so-common tree. It has all kinds of fruits and colorful parrots nesting in it. Underneath of which, sleeps unicorns. And look! there's this huge rainbow with the colors formed by God combined together. The mountains are caped with greenery and the sun is always up the horizon. There! I'll built my house there! Right near the trees. This a dream! No! This was a dream! which has come true! Alas!
The gleaming nature of nature has set me free! Has given me another life! Has tickled and captivated me away from the gloomy days. Its over! The suffering is over! Wasn't it worth enough to take the risk?
The question lies: What if the new world would not have been this amazing? Would I still be blithe?
Yes! At least, I tried and killed the albatross around my neck, of desperation of course.
And so, the story of the window ends. End of suffering with birth of jubilant. After all, Every finish line is the beginning of a new race. :)

Monday, April 23, 2012

Part - II The soul of desperation

A sheer week passed of my eyes staring at the window of despondence. An unknown land awaits for me. A desolate sky calls me. The hidden animals crouch under my imaginative mind. Imaginative yet shallow. Strengthened yet feeble. Every clock I enter the room, the window adheres me. It wants me to open it. Or do I want to open it? I quietly bottom my eyes. What if there are soul sucking monsters? or talent altering winds? What if instead of hoping for more, I lose what I have already? I cannot just gamble. But the window called me. I looked at it. Plain simple window, as long as I do not know what world it shows me. Either a world of happiness, or that of sorrow.
I took one step towards it. What if it shows me new opportunities?
I took another step. What if it has new hopes and glimpses of a prosperous future?
I took another step. But what if it tears my every part?
I hauled there. Maybe I should just continue my life as it is. "Just go with the flow", they say. If I open the window, I wont be able to get back to my present life. It will alter mine. My only life that I persuade. Everyone just follow the normal life, of what our parents did, of what are siblings are doing. Just the normal one. If I open the window, I might get disbanded from my people? I shrugged away and took 2 steps back.
Its not in my pocket to take such a risk.
"But what if grass is greener on the other side"?
What if I take the risk and make my parents proud? Prouder?
The window had done magic to me.
I started taking hasty steps towards it. "I want to see, what lies there, I want to risk my only life". With the gleam in my eyes, I touched the window's panes. The moment it was about to open, I heard a voice.
"Stop! Dont open it", my mother screamed at my back. I quietly came back and sat on my bed. She ensured the window is closed.
"The world there, will eat you alive", she said in the most horrifying manner. "We are not supposed to open it. Not supposed to take risks. Let the lives go as they are". She left.
Maybe she is right. "Let the life go as it is", I murmured  to myself, as I looked at the window.

Stay glued till the last part comes soon. :)

Tuesday, April 17, 2012

Part-I The window which never opened

I have a window in my bedroom. Just parallel to my computer table. Just aside the bed. Just above the cupboards. Its three window panes combined to one. Its huge! Skeleton-ed with brown wood, draped with yellow curtains, it stands tall there. No body can move it. I wake up daily as it deluge my soul with everlasting beams of sunlight and never ending hopes for new day.
In summers, it shimmers with gleaming yellow light right from the morning to evening. In winters, it protects me from jack frost. In autumn, it shields me from witnessing the withering surroundings. And in spring, it gives bench to beautiful butterflies, of whose I can see the shadows. But, yet, it lies there. Unopened. Unvarnished. Covered with dust. The glasses are not that transparent now, the dirt of what-lies-outside has made it a bit opaque. Yet not opaque enough to not bestow me with sunshine.
But, I never opened it. Never witnessed the world that lays outside it. The heavenly skies or the underworld grounds? I dont know. Maybe cos am scared. Scared to face the ultimate delusions of world. Or maybe to realize the nature is jeopardized of hopes. I just never took the courage.
Should I open it and take the risk? They say the window gives a sight of world tour of happiness and love. A few say it only gives tears of pain and screams. Am scared to think of which should I give an ear. What if I open the window and the world is not what I expected it to be? Is it worth taking the risk? The questions endlessly take revolutions around my head's orbit as I glare at my bedroom window.

Hang on till the next part arrives after two days. :)