Deep Thought

"A man would do nothing, if he waited until he could do it so well that no one would find fault with what he has done"
- Cardinal Newman

Friday, July 15, 2011

The hardest part

She didn't call me on her birthday, so did I. Moreover, she didn't even wish me. Why should I? It has happened  many times with me. I've tried to talk to many people and they keep on ignoring me. Tried to gain many's attention but gained only rolling eyes. I called them to my birthday party and I know I was nowhere in their mind during their's. It hurts a lot. Indeed it does.
Not now. Not anymore. I know I have improvised a lot. Made don't know how many friends in almost all parts of the city. That makes me proud.
Anyhow, this post isn't in any negative sense. It's about someone, who tried to be friends with me and I kept keeping her at bay. Even though, somewhere, I do not know, but yes, I've done it to many people. There have been times when people need me, but I haven't given any heed. The reason being: they don't mean much to me. Still, I mean a lot to them. Its paranoiac.
Two days back, I had a look at my phone. How broken its edges have been. How it has lost its metallic lusture. Even the alphabets have started disappearing cos of excessive typing quality of mine. How like a million times it has fallen off from my hand. It needs a cover, badly. A cover which needs no washing, and suits me. Plus, fits in my tiny little hands. I remember I had one a few months back. Which I never used deliberately. True, you remember the importance of things once its gone. Not to forget, It was a cover just for name.
It makes me remember someone. Someone from my college. A simple girl not from this city.
It was my birthday. Having known like a million people from the world and everyone screaming for a treat in my ears, I always have a collective bunch of humans which only get exclusive treats from me.
She wished me. I didn't call her for treat. I remember how nicely she tried to talk to me since the very beginning. I, being selfish on my part, used her extensively for assignments and files. I think she knows this.
Later I remember, the glory in her eyes when I started talking to her. We sat under the infamous tree near the canteen door. It was the exam practical time. Having most of the friends in another batch cos of alphabetical disorder, I only had her in my batch to talk to. We had a nice lunch followed by a chirpy talk. That was the first time we talked for almost two hours without any disjunction. I came to know she belongs from Rajasthan, a city which am fond of. I felt some roots attached to her cos my mum belongs to Ajmer. I haven't been there for more than once. Her golden words about the state made me live there some longer.
We went home. I agreed am a jerk who couldn't understand her in the beginning. We became close friends. Her simplicity touched me.
It was her birthday. I ran screaming her name, almost pounced on and hugged her tight leaving her in awes and open mouthed. She called me for the treat. Wait! I wasn't expecting this nor was I prepared how to react over this. I thought she would have remember I didn't invite her on my birthday treat. I felt small & embarrassed. She is the ocean of love. Am only an apprentice. Since the beginning she'd been appreciating my phone cover, which I barely used. It was a jute one. Just the size of my phone beset with thin lace.
She asked me "where did you buy it from".
"Cultural fest, Assam quarter", I said.
"Buy one for me the next time you visit it, I always wanted one such", she said.
"Ya, sure", I said.
At the end of the day, when we were leaving. I stayed and handed it over to her. Asked her to keep it. When she was about to open her wallet and pay me for that, I hauled her and said, "Keep it as my token of love". She smiled. Her beautiful one , filled with innocence.
On my part, I do not regret giving it to her.  It was a cover just for name (for me).
{For now, I do not have a pic of us together, but I'll get one and upload it as soon as the college reopens}
Thanks Archana, for everything. You taught me a lot. You forged me into another being. I'll always cling up to you.


  1. nice....isme b hidden meaning that i got....

  2. @Varuna,
    :) Thanks for the comment.. Love..

  3. beautiful description :)
    just loved it

  4. @Hardik.. thank you.. your comment means a lot. :)